Christians tend to value prayer very very highly. The Bible actually describes prayer as ‘incense’ and a gift to God:
[..] golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints (Rev 5:8)
But Jesus said that there’s something more important than praying, something that you should stop praying about, and go do it, before you continue with your prayers.
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. (Matt 5:23-24)
In effect Jesus says, put away your yoga mat, go and get dressed for going out, or whatever (these days we have texts and zoom etc so we don’t necessarily have to go – although it does show we’re serious enough if we make the effort to go) – shelve all that for a few minutes – God can wait! – I need to go make amends before I come back and pray (present my offering). Maybe Jesus is telling me, if I haven’t done that my prayers might not smell like sweet incense?
This almost feels like the opposite of the nativity: maybe the right baby in a manger can make a barn smell so sweet, but prayers offered without the accompanying action to make amends will make a church smell like a -barnyard, or zoo?
I wrote quite a lot about Alcoholics Anonymous recently, so perhaps one of my key points got lost in all those words; which was supposed to be: I feel very strongly that “make amends whenever possible” is a key to the success of AA. Because I can pray all I like but if I simply need to go and say ‘sorry’ to someone, or a few people, it seems like God might be pressing the ‘pause’ button on my life until I do. Because (excuse me being this blunt) he’s not interested in stinky prayers from me. He’d rather wait for the incense ones again.